E3’s Judgment Day: Hungover Marine Edition (Day 1)

Sinners, welcome to Day 1 – well, Day 2, tech-nically – of GHG’s E3 coverage. Every morning the day after, we’ll have a mass proclaiming the best games and electronics we were able to demo. You see, we’re not too keen on crunching a bunch of facts from developers, or analyzing every angle from a technical standpoint; we just want to let the congregation know if the shit is fun or not!


Technical Difficulties

And, speaking of fun, we never imagined playing any non-Justice League Batman game at the conference – particularly for Nintendo…? I’m happy to announce that the Wii-U’s graphics are finally HD (hey, thanks for joining the 21st century, guys!) and that their version of Arkham City: Armored Edition looks real slick. Getting used to the Wii-U Gamepad, though, was a different story. Understood, but no one should ever have to go through a 15-minute tutorial when they first play the game. The contrast between the screen’s action and the gamepad’s inventory/map screens is definitely intriguing, and certainly delivered a more interactive experience than simply having to press “start” and nudging through options.

I just wanted to punch more stuff.

From the look on those other young men and women’s faces around the Wii-U, we’re sure they felt similar. My co-host even nearly had a nervous breakdown when the demo forced me to learn every gadget right off the rip. Despite this awkward experience, we approve of Wii-U’s distinct touch to their third party games.


Quickly Overrun

The highlight of E3 for GHG, besides spreading the Holy Word with Minister Camacho Pacheco…


All this for a couple of Tootsie Rolls.


…was Gears of War: Judgment. We didn’t have a clue we’d be demoing the game, or getting some pretty cool t-shirts for our line-waiting efforts. Three GOW:J shirts in 3 days? Gracias. We should probably already be in line for more, but the prequel’s new multiplayer mode is well worth the wait. Again. Overrun pits the Cogs – Baird, Cole, whoever – against new Locusts.. that you can actually play. Dude, these beasts were a hell of a trip, and unlocking the Mauler with 3000 points was just Terrible Juice. The white flags got thrown in this mode combination of Horde and Beast when GHG was able to utilize the more strapping aliens.


Just a few notes from the ever-short Day 1 (only open noon-6! boooooo!):

• Speaking of scary things from out of space, the multiplayer in Aliens: Colonial Marines is fantastic and appeared more challenging than that of GOW:J – and it’s scary as shit. There’s a sense of loneliness in this one, too, as you’re left feeling a little “campaign” when dealing with those irritatingly spooky Xenomorphs. While I’m more excited to play the actual story-mode – seeing how it’s a proper sequel to Alien 3 and all (Resurrection, what?) – the multiplayer offers a unique experience. Hard to do.

Transformers: Fall of Cybertron left me a little unimpressed with its graphics. However, the combination of chopping around canyons, turning on the cool jets, and crunching some robotic foes offered a terrific game-playing dynamic. These ‘bots still have a chance to take us to the promised land.

• Got to play some Madden 13, a sports game franchise I’ve never been good in. And, yup, my Patriots got a little butt whipping by a fellow Ravens fan. Thankfully the game ups the ante with new commentators…

If Tom Brady's not playing then I could care less, Jim.

…. yet, since this was only a demo in Exhibition, only time will tell if it finally reaches the presentation plateau of NBA 2K. The Madden expo is also the best spot at E3 to buy some weed. That’s if you’re into that sort of thing…


Follow us on Twitter @GodHatesGeeks today for Day 2 updates…and our God Hates Geeks Facebook page. See’s ya.

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4 Replies to “E3’s Judgment Day: Hungover Marine Edition (Day 1)”

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