GAME OF THRONES [Season 4 Premiere Re-Cap]: ‘Two Swords’, LOTS of Lip.

But I shaved!
But I shaved!
  • The reunion of Jaime (Nikolaj Coster-Waldau) and Cersei Lannister (Lena Headey). “The Kingslayer” wants nothing more than to be (among other things) with his sister, but Cersei — being the callus bitch she is — blames him for being kidnapped and leaving her alone. There’s a moment in this episode where Jamie seems to finally get it: your sis is pretty much a c*&%, dude. 
  • Last but not least, the turning point of S04E01: the relationship between Arya Stark and The Hound (Rory McCann). When the girl version of Link from Legend of Zelda finds vengeance, it’s nothing short of glorious. She’s sneaky, precise and right before she sticks her sword through Polliver (Andy Kellegher), she reminds him — with his own words — why he deserved the American Psycho treatment. If you’ve read the books, you know there is more to these scenes than shown, but the pacing on TV was nonetheless perfect. This is also the part in the story where Arya and Sandor Clegane don’t necessarily trust each other, but recognize the benefit of having reaching other around. R-E-S-P-E-C-That.
Don't worry. I'm not getting service out here either.
Don’t worry. I’m not getting any service out here either.

Reasons for some extra “Hail Marys” and “Our Fathers”:

  • I know this is the season opener and that they’re attempting to breach last season to now… and I also know they’re introducing new characters, but damn there was a lot of talking. Even when the boobs were in play… TALKING!
  • Not enough Dragons! Your Dutchess reall hoped to see them involved in something more than just mere rumbling over some food.

Overall, the Season 4 premiere did just enough to prevent a dull return, all the while proving one hell of a schematic plot from D.B Weiss. And despite the plethora of over-conversation, the ep satisfied most of my desire for blood, swords and good looking faces.

Now bring on the Purple Wedding!

3.75 (out of 5) Swords of King's Landing.
3.75 (out of 5) Ice-Melted Swords of Stark.








Game of Thrones airs every Sunday night at 9pm on HBO.

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