MY SPY [Film Review]: I (No Longer) Walk Alone.

“Father” #HeelSean Farrell

My Spy (PG-13), directed by Peter Segal (Get Smart, The Longest Yard) and written by The Hoeber’s (Battleship, The Meg), was suppose to come out last year, then early this year — and then Hollywood heard the familiar cries of “gimme what I want!” and MWM Studios just released this family-friendly affair onto Amazon Prime…

WWE Hall of Famer Dave Bautista plays an ex-Special Forces Army Ranger dude named JJ who’s having a tough time transitioning from bad-ass super macho army-of-one to cloak & dagger espionage secret agent man. He’s put on “desk duty” after a fiasco with his last assignment, and is sent with his hero-worshiping over zealous tech hacker/guru Kristen Schaal (Bob’s Burgers) on a stakeout. Their mission is to watch over the widow of the dead brother of a known terrorist who’s activities are connected to the case JJ just bungled. Coincidence? Sure.

The Widower is an ER nurse living with her and almost-latchkey 9-year-old daughter who is having trouble making new friends at school.. since they recently relocated to Chicago from France. JJ’s cover is blown by the girl who begins to blackmail him into teaching her how to be a spy to help make friends, you know, while she helps dude become more vulnerable and humanlike, and maybe, just maybe fall in love. Awwww.

Next person to call me “Deacon” gets thrown into detention.

The majority of the film is paint-by-numbers formulaic, been there — done that — know where this is going but screw it we’re already 2/3’s in let’s see how this ends. On the surface this looks like Dave “The Animal” Batista.. pardon me.. Dave “Drax” (in GOTG) Bautista’s answer to John Cena’s Playing with Fire; but, this film has just a bit more heart to it. Big Dave has actual chemistry with his young costar Chloe Coleman (also great in Big Little Lies, Upload). Dave comes across as a bit wounded and guarded, using his angry hulk-like persona as a shield that is chipped away by the wisdom beyond her years, precocious kid-like antics of Chloe.

The action is full throttle, plus there is a decent mix of slapstick humor, drama, a touch of romance, danger, betrayal, shocking reveals and hearts. This movie really feels like you’ve seen it before, but it’s a solid 90-minutes and very well executed. My Spy should leave everyone in the locked-down household with a smile on their face. 3.5/5 Bibles.

Sean Farrell

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