POLAR [Netflix Movie Review]: Soul On Ice.

Felipe “The 3rd Deacon” Crespo

I’ll be honest. I’m not 100% clear on whether or not we reviewed Polar yet. But if it got anything less than 4 bibles, that review is wrong. So here we are. Sorry for the delay (is the polite thing to say).

The plot revolves around The Black Kaiser himself: Hannibal Lec.. Sorry… Mads Mikkel… Again, apologies: Duncan Vizla. Mr Vizla up until recently was top dog at the Damocles assassin agency, which has an odd “Yo, once you’re 50, you’re out” retirement policy. They also have a really cool matching contributions thing that.. long story short, the company owes him 8 million and some change on his birthday (which is two weeks away). Unfortunately the current boss is having recently retired agents killed so he doesn’t have to honor the deal. What a tool.

I like that –from what we’re shown– The Kaiser doesn’t have some tragic backstory. No family killed in front of his eyes, no dead puppy.. I mean, he has a dog, but, I don’t want to ruin it. We get glimpses into what type of person he is through his actions and flashbacks. Nothing is really spelled out as to who he is. It’s kinda refreshing and adds to his air of mystery.

You’re just tryin to get me to say the words “cock back” and “squeeze”, ain’t cha?

The most important supporting characters: Katheryn Winnick‘s Vivian, Herman Lucas‘ Mr Blut and Vanessa Hudgens‘ adorable Camille are fantastic. And I appreciated that Duncan and Camille weren’t shoehorned into a love story. The assassination crew that went after The Kaiser isn’t that fleshed out, to be honest, but considering their role in the film, I didn’t really mind. They were entertaining enough and did their roles well.

I may be a tad bias reviewing this movie, since any film starring Mads Mikkelsen is already at least pretty good in my eyes. But as you noticed from the beggining: 4/5 Hallowed Out Bibles (1 with a gun, three with extra clips). This already sets the bar high for comic book movies this year.

P.S. Netflix’s hatred of hallways that started with Daredevil (RIP) lives on.

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